My gaze sets the scene
for your worries,
a man who can't be his age, all his
intellect trapped in cut to shape,
pressed, somewhat tight apparels of
politeness, good manners,
the mind that holds on to iron bars
and screams for freedom
escapes your eyes.
Had we the time
to enter dingy rooms of nonsense,
to stay long enough to
make some sense of them,
to cross the threshold, break speech-boundaries,
nonstopness of noises in the name
of music,
wild beats like morphine in the veins,
or nerves, or whatever,
artificial colour pools, fake rainbows,
death of drunk paralysis,
had we
the insanity to hold reluctant hands
I see your toenails, painted blue
so strange, your feet
look blue too
from nine-inch style-burden,
but they speak to me better
than your feigned freshness
of smiles, thoughts, fancies
They have a new product
that reduces the smell of a corpse
that rises from my thoughts,
a new drug which makes one
think less, and be a peacock
They used to check the books
I carried, now I carry none,
but they inspect my Notebook now,
everywhere - they have no doubt
in my power to corrupt
people like them,
all happy peacocks
Don't look into my eyes,
they will drain your dreams
Oh, I wish I had a glimpse of you
before you came out, to make sure
that you were the you I saw
on the picture the agent gave me,
a glossy picture, all colours,
and eyes hidden in thick make-up,
but I know now that you are you,
I just need to avoid your eyes
Just be with me, I paid for this,
and know how to get more than
what you can give, stay,
don't cross the threshold,
don't spill the rainbows out of your tears,
I can't take too much reality,
let me be a freak, for a day
or two,
can't you see my despair?